Culture Shock
by koalainglasses
Summary: Hermione, Harry, Ron, and Ginny are offered a trip to the US to go to school w hermione's cousin. the sick, twisted teachers have Draco go with them. Madness ensues! rated for language, and slash, rating may change
1. Stupid time zones!

**Author's note: **_i didn't like the way the chapter was originally- so i re wrote it. then i forgot the disclaimer so i had to re-post it again and well hopefully this time i'll get it right or this list will just keep getting longer!_

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Harry Potter, or the ringtone of hermione's phone- i think Possessed Squirrel came up with that. I only own the American characters.**

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Hermione's POV-

I was awakened by the sound of my phone ringing next to my ear _Ring-ring-ring-ringey-ringey-ringey-ring-ring! _Slowly I opened my eyes and picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hermione? It's Shawna."

"Shawna who?"

"Shawna your cousin from New York stupid."

"Oh. Hi. What's up?" I didn't feel like telling my cousin that because of the time difference, Shawna had woken me up at 3:00 AM.

"Well, this year my school is having this whole big thing about cultural diversity and so I was wondering if you and some of your friends want to came and go to school here for a couple of months."

"I don't know. I'd have to do some other stuff first."

"OK! See you soon!"

I hung up the phone and went back to sleep.

Later that morning, I was sitting at my desk, writing a letter to Professor Dumbledore. Let's just say I wasn't getting very far. Finally I finished, and sent my owl, Maritan, to deliver it.

I quickly took a shower, got dressed, straightened my hair, and packed my things. Soon after I had finished, the doorbell rang and mom's voice called up the stairs, "Hermione, your friends are here!"

I raced down the stairs, to see Harry standing in the doorway, with Ron behind him. "Hi Harry, Ron."

"C'mon Hermione, Dad's waiting in the car." Ron said impatiently.

"I'll help you with your stuff." Harry offered.

"Thanks Harry." I said, "But I've got it already." I reached into my pocket and pulled out my trunk that I had shrunken down to a size small enough to fit into the pocket of my jeans.

"I thought you weren't allowed to do magic outside of school?" Ron said suspiciously.

"Shhh! Don't tell anyone!"

I said good-bye to my parents and ran out the door with Ron and Harry to Mr. Weasley's waiting car.

I lay in bed at the burrow the next morning, participating in one of my favorite pastimes, sleeping late and mentally reviewing all of the knowledge stored in my photographic memory. Suddenly I was awakened by the sound of an owl screeching at the window. I ignored it, and like an extremely annoying alarm clock, it got louder.

Groaning, I got up and went to the window and let Maritan inside, and took the reply from the outstretched talon.

_Dear Ms. Granger,_

_I do think that this program is a wonderful idea and will be supporting it fully, however, I do think that in the true nature of diversity another person from another house should attend. Please arrive at Hogwarts on September 1, to see who will be going with you before your departure._

_Sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

_Deputy Headmistress._

I reread the letter twice wondering why I had received a reply from Professor McGonagall even though the letter was addressed to Professor Dumbledore.

'If this was America, I could have her arrested for tampering with the mail, and then I could sue her for invasion of privacy and not warning me that coffee is hot.' I thought before leaving the room to tell Harry, Ron and Ginny.

xxxxxx

Dumbledore's POV-

I sat in my office, waiting for Professors McGonagall and Snape to arrive. The door opened to reveal Minerva McGonagall.

"Good Evening Professor Dumbledore." She greeted me.

"Where the hell did Snape go? Better yet, Where the hell am I?"

Snape appeared in the doorway behind McGonagall. "Hello, now what is this meeting about, I have to think up new ways to torture my students."

"Well, Miss Granger has been invited to participate in a cultural exchange program and A few others are going too. We just have to add one more person for the sake of irony."

"Well, who's already in the group?" Severus asked sarcastically.

"Potter, Weasley and Weasley." Minerva replied.

"For the sake of drama, irony and because it will be funny as hell, I think we should have Draco Malfoy go with them."

"Good idea Severus. What do you think, Albus?"

I who had been ignoring them looked up triumphantly, holding a small bag in each hand. "Nine sickels and a dungbomb! This is my lucky day!" Mcgonagall and Snape looked helplessly at each other, saying "If anyone asks, he approved it." in unison.

xxxxxx

Malfoy's POV-

I entered my bedroom to see one of the Hogwarts owls sitting on my bed. I took the letter and sent the bird out the window. I opened the letter expecting to see a traditional start of term book list but instead found this:

_Dear Mr. Malfoy,_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected for Hogwarts first cultural exchange program. This is not an option, you must participate or else_.(Cause if you don't it won't be nearly as funny._ STOP IT SEVERUS!) Please Report on September 1 to meet with your group before departing._

_Sincerely,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

_Deputy Headmistress_

'Cool, I feel special.' I thought as I went to finish packing 'But then of course, why wouldn't they pick me? I'm the best looking guy in the entire school!'

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**Author's note: **_OK. Sooo.. what did you think? REVIEW or i'll send the penguin army after you._


	2. Snape Laughs?

**Diclaimer:** I own nothing. Except maybe this little ball of lint that I just pulled out of my pocket.

**Warnings:** little slashy thoughts between Harry and Draco- Don't like slash- i suggest you stop reading this story.

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Harry's POV-

Our time at the Burrow went much too quickly. Although I was there for almost a month it felt like two days. When I'm there it feels like I actually have a family.

On September first, we were nearly late- as usual- for the Hogwarts Express. We ran into Malfoy once on the train, but all he said was "Glad I don't have to see them this year." Before smugly walking away. _How does Malfoy know that we won't be seeing each other this year? Did the news of our trip get announced to the whole school?_

By the time we arrived at Hogwarts, I just wanted to find out whatever they had to tell us and leave already. You would think I would have a little more feeling about the fact that I was going to be leaving the place that had been practically a second home fore me for almost six years. But apparently I'm a heartless bastard that just wants to get away from all the people who are depending on me. Well at least that's how Sirius put it once. (a/n: for purposes of this fic-Sirius was either never killed, or came back to life- whichever you prefer.)

When Ron, Hermione, Ginny and I walked into the entrance hall, we were ushered into a room by Professor McGonagall. We were expecting the room to be empty, but Snape was there- laughing hysterically which was disturbing in itself- Snape laughing? That's unheard of. But I soon figured out what he was laughing about when a certain person walked into the room. Draco Malfoy.

"Oh my GOD! Professor! You can't mean he's coming with us!" Hermione exclaimed turning to McGonagall.

It dawned on me after she said it. Draco Malfoy, the most perfect seventeen-year- old to ever grace this earth... _Did I just think that?? NO! NO! NO! Malfoy is NOT perfect and you do NOT think about him that way!!!_

Malfoy was coming with us. Oh joy.

xxxxxx

Hermione's POV-

Malfoy walked into the room and I suddenly understood why Professor Snape was laughing. Malfoy was coming with us.

Somebody kill me now.

xxxxxx

Ron's POV-

_Snape's laughing. This cannot be good_. _Why is Malfoy here? _As I was thinking this Hermione turned to McGonagall, saying,"Oh my GOD! Professor! You can't mean he's coming with us!?!"

_Malfoy's coming with us? You have got to be kidding me. _

xxxxxx

Draco's POV-

When I walked into the entrance hall, I was greeted by Professor Snape, who led me down a hallway and into an empty room. After a few minutes of silence, he started to laugh hysterically. It was extremely strange. I have never seen him laugh. EVER.

I asked to go down to the Slytherin dormitories to get something of mine that I needed for the trip. I was lying, of course, I just needed to get away from him. He was starting to scare me. After a few minutes of aimlessly wandering around the castle, I decided to go back to see if Snape had stopped laughing.

I entered the room to see McGonagall standing there with Granger, the two Wesley's and... Harry Potter.

Granger turned to McGonagall saying something about "he's not going with us..." When suddenly it dawned on me. I wasn't going alone They were coming too.

I did a mental happy dance- _I still have people to make fun of! And Potter's coming too! And...Wait- did I just do a mental happy dance because of Harry Potter? This cannot be happening! Potter is not like that! And Neither am I! Potter is a worthless ball of scum that just happened to beat Voldemort. That is all. He is not the boy who has the cutest black hair that falls into his enchanting green eyes who is an incredible Quidditch player and incredibly sexy! NO! Stop It! He is a GRYFFINDOR!!! _

This was going to be an interesting year.

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**A/N: **Sorry it was so short- but i'm doing this at like 10:30 at night and my mom's yellling at me to get off the computer, so bye!

A/N 2:I almost forgot- PLEASE REVIEW! I'll be your best friend!!!!! (Well, It worked in Kindergarden)


	3. Obsession, a conscience and shiny things

DISCLAIMER- all of the HP universe belongs to the all powerful JKR

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Hermione's POV-

After we had all gotten over our shock, Professor McGonagall continued-

"Now, your plane leaves in an hour. I expect you to all behave and try as hard as possible to fit in with the muggles. And Also, Since you will be missing most of the school year and your final exams, you all have an assignment" Everyone groaned, except for me. I love homework. Homework is my life. I live for homework... "You will be given this," She reached behind her and picked up a small, muggle video camera. "I want you to record some of your time in America, and when you return, your footage will be presented to the school."

I looked at Ron nervously. _The entire school? They're crazy! Oh my Gosh! I'm going to look like such an idiot! I can't look like an idiot! I'm smart! I do my homework! I worship homework! I live for homework! Homework is my friend!..._

xxxxxx

Draco's POV-

_What is that thing? Wait- Did she just say it was a _muggle_ thing? I don't like muggle things. How am I supposed to work that? It is rather shiny though... I like shiny things! _

xxxxxx

Ron's POV-

We have to make a movie of our life in the US. This is going to be fun! Not. Where did McGonagall come up with this? It was probably Snape. He's just the sadistic bastard to come up with this kind of thing. Oh well. McGonagall Says we have to go to the plane place now. Hmmm. I've never been in a muggle airyporty before. This should be fun! I wonder why Dad didn't come. He would have loved this.

xxxxxx

Harry's POV-

We were on our way to the airport. This should be fun, I've heard that muggle flights to America are long. I sincerely hope I don't have to sit next to Malfoy.

_Liar. _The little voice in my head told me.

**I'm not lying. Who are you?**

_I'm your conscience. We haven't spoken in a while. _

**Oh. Sorry. And what do you mean I'm lying?**

_You're lying. You do want to sit next to him because you are absolutely totally obsessed with him. In actuality you'd like to be doing a lot more than just sitting next to him. Though as your conscience I should advise that such behavior is liable to get you arrested. _

**I'm not gay.**

_You said it._

**I'm NOT GAY!**

_Can you say denial?_

**Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! **

_No. You are and you just need to admit it to yourself. _

**Fine! I'm Gay! Are you happy now?**

_You do know that you just said that out loud._

**I did? **I looked around nervously. Everyone else was too preoccupied with the car being late to pick us up to care.

_No. I lied. That was hilarious though._

Note to self- never listen to the voices in your head. Suddenly, a black car pulled around the corner and stopped in font of us. The window rolled down and a voice that sounded familiar told us to get in the car.

After I had gotten in I realized why the voice was so familiar. It was Sirius!

"Sirius? What are you doing here?" Hermione asked.

" I have a job as a muggle driver, so when McGonagall mentioned you needed a ride, I volunteered." Malfoy muttered something under his breath to which Sirius replied, "Yes Malfoy, I am an ex-convict. May I remind you that your father is a death eater and was once a convict himself until Fudge let him out saying he was innocent. At least I had the brains to get myself out on my own."

"Liar." Malfoy was livid. _Isn't he cut when he's mad? _

**Yeah. No! Stop it!**

"Yeah. I am a liar. I'm just not lying now"

"STOP LYING!"

"I'm not lying Malfoy. Get that through that thick skull of yours!" Suddenly the car stopped. and Sirius turned around cheerfully. "We're here!"

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**  
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A/N: so what'd ya think? yeah i know it was short, but i wanted the sirport chapter to be sort of on its own, so i apologise. I'll try to update soon. and now for review replies...

;; inspirational music;;

**mich712**- Thanks for pointing that out! I never would have noticed that! Bu ti mean people cal other people at 10PM all the time, so what's the big deal right? LOL

**darklighttogether-**Yay! You recognised the Potter Puppet Pals quotes! You get the random award of the day!

**Possessed Squirrel- **You are still one of my best friends. maybe now your my bestest best friend? Who knows? TTYL!

And to all of you whom I didn't address personally- thank you so much for taking the time to review! Please continue to do so!... I'll give you a cookie


	4. The airport and more shiny things

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing

**Warnings: **I have made up my mind, this will mose definitely be a Harry-Draco slash fic, If you don't like that, or don't think you will be able to face your fears, DON'T READ IT!

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Hermione's POV-

Sirius pulled into a space in the parking lot of the airport and led us through the doors into the busy terminal.

"This is as far as I can go with you." Sirius said turning to us. "The security people don't let anyone that's not actually flying past the ticket counter. Good-bye." He gave Ron, Harry and myself each a hug, rustled Harry's hair, and waved as he walked back to the car.

"So now what do we do Hermione?" Ron asked looking at me expectantly.

We found the ticket counter and got on line to wait. So we waited. And waited, and them we waited some more. Ginny and I amused ourselves by playing MASH, using all of the boy's names as potential soul mates. So far I had ended up marrying Harry, having three kids, living in a shack and driving a box-on-wheels, and marrying Malfoy, having ten kids, living in a mansion and driving a Mercedes. Ginny ended up marrying Ron, and then stopped playing.

Harry and Ron were deeply involved in an argument with Malfoy about which houses Quidditch team would kick the other's ass this year. They weren't being all too quite about it either.

"Gryffindor will kick Slytherin's fat ass from here to the moon and back. There is no way Slytherin's going to beat us this year." Ron said to Malfoy.

"Yes they will, there is no way that Gryffindor will beat us! Do you hear me? NO WAY! Without your little golden boy seeker, Gryffindor's going down."

"I can say the same thing about Slytherin." Harry retorted. When Draco looked confused, he sighed and continued. "Hello? You happen to be the Slithering seeker, dumbass. And Ron, don't talk about the Slithering team's weight problems. It's not their fault that they might be like a certain over-pampered, overfed, neglecting muggle who enjoy torturing their cousin, now is it?"

"It's all right, Diddley-dums! We'll get you another when we get home!"

"Speaking of the certain over-pampered, overfed, neglecting muggle who enjoys torturing his cousin." Harry said sarcastically, pointing across to the other side of the room. There stood a Couple and their extremely fat son. I assumed the couple with the extremely fat son was the Dursleys.

"Harry. Don't do anything stupid." I began, but Harry had obviously taken the extra magic privileges to his head and decided to use them. Harry took his wand out of his pocket, pointed it at the extremely fat boy across the room who was throwing a tantrum, and suddenly the boy was replaced by an extremely large pig. May I also mention that the pig had no tail.

"Harry, you are going to be in so much trouble." I said. I pointed out to him that although the transformation was quite good, he had neglected to give his pig/cousin a tail.

"No I didn't. I mean they had to have the one Hagrid gave him surgically removed. I'd hate to make them have to have it done again. The doctors might ask questions."

I sighed, _Harry has some sick twisted view of revenge, now, doesn't he?_

xxxxxx

Harry's POV-

When I heard that voice I knew who it was. The only person I had ever heard use the words "Diddley-dums" was Aunt Petunia. I looked across to the opposite counter to see my oh-so-wonderfull "family" standing there, retrieving their tickets for their trip to Spain. I did it before I had even fully thought about it. I pulled out my wand and Dudley was a pig. It was extremely funny to see Aunt Petunia's shocked face and Uncle Vernon's Rage as he looked around for whoever had replaced their son with a barnyard animal. His eyes fell on me. I knew what was going to happen . He was going to shout "BOY" at the top of his lungs, run across the room, try to hurt me, be hit by a few hexes, and then we'd all run like hell. Fortunately, the line chose that moment to move up, and Hermione quickly retrieved our tickets, and we were off to have security check our bags.

Hermione, Ginny and I went through the metal detectors without mishap, although I did catch a few strange glances at our wands. When Malfoy went through, the air was pierced by a loud siren that sounded a lot like "WEEEEEEEEE-OOOOOOOOOHHHHH! WEEEEEEEE-OOOOHHHHHHHHH" and hurt all of our ears. The security guard had him empty his pockets and instantly as he did so I knew what the problem was. Malfoy had just pulled a Gringott's bag out of his pocket. NOT good. When the bad was opened, and the coins were poured out I saw the surprised looks on the faces of all the security people.

"What is all that" One of the security women asked him.

"Money." Malfoy said smoothly, not realizing that the muggle woman had never seen wizard money before.

"I've never seen money like this before."

Hermione stepped forward and said "It's antique play money. We're going to an antique convention to see how much it's worth."

"How old is it" The muggle woman challenged, obviously not totally convinced

"I dunno, hundred years maybe two? I 'm not the expert on antique play money here"

"All right, you can go." Hermione and Malfoy bagged up the money and we walked together to board the flight.

xxxxxx

Draco's POV-

The airport was big, and full of shiny things, lots and lots of shiny muggle things._ Note to self. Self? Is it all right for me to like muggle things if they're shiny?_

**That all depends on what you mean by 'okay'**

_I have a very strong feeling that you are not supposed to have voices respond to notes to yourself. I also have a very strong feeling that your not supposed to talk back to them. Who are you anyway?_

**Ugggg! Do I have to explain this to everyone? I am your conscience. **

_Really? COOL! I have a conscience! I have a conscience! Da-da-da-da-da DA! Da-da-da-da-da-DA! Oooh! Fun music! I have a musical conscience! Woohoo! Go me! Woohoo! _**Wow. Well hate to burst your bubble, but I'm not technically just your conscience.**

_pop Whadda ya mean? You don't love me anymore? sobbs _

**Well, technically, I'm a traveling conscience, I have more that one person to watch over and be their all knowing guide to life. **

_You really like the all knowing thing don't you. _

**Yes I do. Well, anyway, I just came here to tell you that it is okay to like shiny things as well as other things cough-people-cough**

_Cool. Than- Whadda ya mean PEOPLE?_

**coughHarryPotercough**

_I don't like POTTER! _

**Yes you do.**

_No I don't._

**Yes, you _do_.**

_No I _don't!

**Yes.**

_No._

**Yes.**

_No._

**Yes.**

_NO!_

**Well I can see this conversation's going nowhere.

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**A/N:** Sorry people, that's all I have for now, My mom's making me eat dinner and get ready to go to the dance. Oh, joy. And To my reviewers- I LOVE YOU :musical notes _I love you, you..._: OH NO YOU DON'T :hit's large nulti-colored dinosaurs on the head with large stick: Sorry I don't have any time for personal replies to all of you, but I just wanted to let you know that you all totally ROCK, (wow was that cliche, suddenly the author finds she dosen't care) oh well, bye for now!


	5. Ginny the redneck woman

**Disclaimer- **Anything that you recognize, most likely belongs to.. um someone who is not me, or JKR, most of it belongs to JKR, for now. (Muahahahaha!)

**A/N:**wow I was re reading my last chapter and I noticed that the authors note on the bottom got doubled, what was up with that? I fixed it, but for all of you who saw it before I did, wasn't that weird? whatever- READ ON!

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Harry's POV- 

Guess who I had to sit next to on the plane. yep, Ginny. Haha , had you fooled there didn't I? Bet you thought I ended up next to Malfoy, Didn't you? Well, I came quite close to it actually, I traded seats with Ginny about two seconds before the plane took off and therefore I was saved from having to listen to Malfoy whine for the entire flight. Almost. Malfoy whines pretty loudly.

About Halfway through the flight, Malfoy apparently noticed the headphones that were plugged into the armrest of the seat. He looked at Ginny, confused. "What in hell is this?" Ginny shrugged, having never seen them before then either, so I stepped in.

"They're head phones Malfoy. You listen to music with them."  
"How do they work?"

"Put them on your head, and I'll turn them on...Hold on... Just a minute." I pulled the channel guide out of the pocket and found the number I was looking for. I punched in the channel- 1055- country, Volume, level 10.

Malfoy started to smile, then, I think realizing that it was country music, ripped the headphones off of his head. "What the hell was that Potter?"

"That would be Gretchen Wilson." I turned to see Ginny sitting there with the headphones on her head, happily singing along. "I'm a redneck woman and I'm a..."

I turned my attention away from Ginny and back to Malfoy. "Let's just pretend we never heard that. Shall we?"

"Good idea." Funny, that was one of the only civil conversations we'd ever had, and it was about country music. or as Ginny would say "Not really country music but country-ish music. It's sort of more pop than country. Well it's still country, but... "Well, I'd rather not get into that.

xxxxxx

Ginny's POV-

_'Cause I'm redneck woman, an' I aint no high class broad. I'm just a product of my raisin': I say: "Hey y'all" and "Yee Haw!" An' I keep my Christmas lights on on my front porch all year long. And I know all the words to every Charlie Daniels song. So here's to all my sisters, out there, keeping it country. Let me get a big "Hell, Yeah" from the redneck girls like me: Hell, Yeah. _

God I love that song! It's country but it's not! I love it!

But on awell, not lighter, but different at least, note. Draco has no taste in music. I can't even give him the excuse of not having muggle parents, cause I don't either. I can't believe he doesn't like this song! I mean what's not to love?

_Baby, I'm redneck woman, an' I aint no high class broad. I'm just a product of my raisin': I say: "Hey y'all" and "Yee Haw!" An' I keep my Christmas lights on on my front porch all year long. And I know all the words to every Charlie Daniels song. So here's to all my sisters, out there, keeping it country. Let me get a big "Hell, Yeah" from the redneck girls like me: Hell, Yeah._

xxxxxx

Ron's POV-

I love muggles. Well, at least their airplanes. Whoever decided to put the seats in three's on one side and in two's on the other is a bloody genius. And I especially love whoever put two of our tickets a row behind the other three. That means I got to spend the entire flight, alone, with Hermione. Oh HELL yes!

Muggles- I LOVE YOU!

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**A/N: **Hey all you crazy people who are reading this story- what's going on in your life? my life sucks at the moment. I've been sick for three days, but you don't really care about that right now, do you? 

AE- Didn't think so.

KG- DO you have a name or something?

AE- Yes- Chester E Williamson III. And no on to review replies-

**KittyKat199x-** I'm dead, lol sry bout not being in school again, call me!

**LazyLacy-** OMG! you are like my favorite reviewer! Breaking Benjamin rocks, thanx!

**Possessed Squirrel-** Shiny things and sugar around you are a DANGEROUS combination. CU soon!

KG- and so now all of you be good little reviewers and well duh REVIEW!

CW- we'll send you cookies! (**PS- **we'll send you two, so that you have a backup, just in case. LOL )


	6. Torture devices for saftey measures

**KG: **Hello Everybody! How are you? I'm good, but...

**CW: **No one cares about your life, they just want to hear the freakin story!

**KG: **Fine I know when I'm not wanted! Here's the chapter...

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Hermione's POV- 

_Why is Ron hitting on me? I don't really want to be hit on at the moment. This is kinda pissing me off. Stop it Ron! Stop! Don't touch that! Leave the headphone's alone! _

Why are boys so annoying? And why didn't I sit with Ginny? Oh well, there's only an hour left in the flight anyway.

xxxxxx

Harry's POV-

There's only a little bit more time before we get off this godforsaken plane. Oh look! Now there's only one hour and fifty-five minutes more to go! Yay! Happiness!

_However, getting off the plane means you won't be able to be in such a close proximity with Draco anymore._

**You again? What do you want now? There's only fifty-eight minutes left in the flight! Can't you just leave me alone?**

_Fine, if that's what you really want..._

**Bye!**

_But... I'm your conscience!_

**Here, take this sickle. Call somebody who cares.**

_I hate you._

xxxxxx

Ginny's POV-

I have made a conclusion- Draco Malfoy is a whiny, annoying spoiled brat. He is also easily amused. He cannot, however sit still for more than about two hours, and attempting to make him do so may be hazardous to your health. I find that he likes Good Charlotte and Evanescence, although that is most likely because he was watching music videos and he thinks Amy Lee is hot.

Thankfully this plane ride will be over in about oh, I'd say fifty-five minutes, but I mean, who's counting?

xxxxxx

Ron's POV-

There's only forty-five minutes left in the flight. That means I only have forty-five more minutes to be next to Hermione! Why must you do this to me cruel world?

Forty-four...

xxxxxx

Draco's POV-

There's only half an hour left until we land! Yay! I don't have to sit in this really uncomfortable seat anymore! Who invented these "seat belts" anyway? Whoever they were, they were sick, sick people to invent such a torturous device and try to pass it off as a safety measure.

Twenty-nine minutes and counting.

xxxxxx

Harry's POV-

We have about fifteen minutes left until we land. Thank GOD! I thought it could never happen! The muggles really need to find a better way top travel! That flight is so long. It's crazy! Why do they enjoy torturing us so?

I think my ass just fell asleep. I didn't know that was possible, but apparently, it is.

xxxxxx

Hermione's POV-

Five minutes until we land. I can't wait! This is going to be so much fun! I just can't believe that I get to see Shawna again! It's been so long since I've seen her! This is going to be so much fun this year- going to school with Shawna! I can't wait.

Oh! Something just occurred to me! At Shawna's school, Muggle studies is a mandatory class, and the housing is entirely styled like that of Muggle housing- with electricity and phones and Internet and everything! This is going to be so great!

Malfoy's gonna die! He'll freak at all the Muggle technology! He'll never be able to survive! HA! HA! He's never going to make it through the year if he has to live like a Muggle!

Oh, look! We've landed!

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KG: So... What did you think? c'mon tell me!

CW: Yeah! we really want to know!

AP: Traitor! DIE!

CW: Well, um I gotta go! bye!

KG-.-; wow. Well, um I have a little question for all of you ! Do you think I should write in the other character's POV's as well, (like Hermione's cousin and her friends) or just the original HP characters' POV"S? Please tell me so i can write more! PLEASE REVIEW!


	7. Hyper tour guide

KG: Hey peoples! How are all of you? My life sux at the moment cause a "friend" of mine found out who I like and is now spreading it all over my entire school. But anyhoo... On with the chapter!

* * *

Hermione's POV-

Woo hoo! We landed! Yay! Maybe Ron will go away now! Yeah, I know it's a slim chance, but a girl can dream can't she?

Any ways, we got off the plane and walked off into the terminal when a girl with black and blue hair came up to us. "Hermione Granger?"

"Yes, that's me. Can I help you?" I wasn't trying to be rude, but I was kind of annoyed. I didn't know who this person was or what they wanted, but all I wanted at this point was to find Shawna and go to bed.

"Hi, I'm Carla Mapherson. I'm Shawna's friend."

"Um, nice to meet you, but where's Shawna?"

"Carla? Are they here yet? Did I miss them?" I looked over Carla's shoulder to see my cousin Shawna, dressed in mainly black and carrying a video camera. Apparently she saw me cause she squeaked "Hermione!" And ran over to give me a hug.

"Hey Shawna. Oh, by the way, these are my friends, Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Ginny Weasley. Oh, and that's Draco Malfoy."

Carla tapped Shawna on the shoulder and looked as if she was about to say something, but was stopped by Shawna's glare. Hmmm. I wonder what that was all about.

xxxxxx

Harry's POV-

Hermione's Cousin Shawna seems pretty cool. Even if she is kind of scary. I seriously think that girl has some sort of problem, cause she was hyper the entire car ride. Thank God that Carla was diving, or we all would have died.

Shawna was basically just rambling on about everything, and then as we got closer to her house, she started playing tour guide, saying things like "And to your left you will see LMS. Thank god you don't have to go there." And "over to the right, is The post office, although it will be of pretty much no use to you since you all have owls."

That girl is seriously dangerous. She should be locked up.

xxxxxx

Draco's POV-

Hermione's cousins are muggles. All except for Shawna. All of them- muggles! How can I be expected to live with muggles for an entire year? Wait until Father hears about this. I'll be out of here before you can say- well, what should I say?

_Well, you could always say 'I love Harry Potter'_

**Will you stop with that already? It's really starting to get to me. **

_Harry Potter_

**STOP IT!**

_No. I don't wanna._

**If you say 'Harry Potter' one more time...**

_Ooh, He's an angry Malfoy! H-A-R-R-Y... P-O-T-T-E-R! Harry Potter! Harry Potter! Wow, this is fun! Harry-really frickin hot-Potter!_

**Mommy!**

xxxxxx

Ginny's POV-

Shawna and Carla seem really cool. They're really hyper, but still, they're cool. Carla mentioned that a friend of theirs, Heather, is having a last week of summer vacation pool party, and we're all invited. When I mentioned that I didn't bring a bathing suit, Shawna and Carla looked at each other and said "Mall. Tomorrow. All of you, with us." in unison. That scared me a little bit.

But, we're going shopping! YAY! I love shopping! Shopping us wonderful! And we get to go to a mall! I've never been to an actual mall, although Hermione has, and she says they're pretty nice- really big with lots of people and lots of stores. It's supposed to be better than Hogsmeade. I CAN'T WAIT!

xxxxxx

Ron's POV-

Shawna's house is not what I expected. It's normal. It's just her, her parents and her younger sisters, and she's the only witch. The house isn't that big though- four bedrooms, a living room, dining room, family room, which is also an office, and a garage.

We ate dinner with her parents-Margie and Kate were at a friends party- and that was one of the strangest experience of my life. Her parents were basically silent throughout the entire meal, and kept shooting us strange looks. It was like they were afraid of us or something. After they had finished eating they basically ran away from the table, saying they had to go grocery shopping.

Grocery Shopping, at 800 PM, when they had the whole day to do it. Sure.

Shawna said we could split the bedrooms- guys in one, girls in the other, or we could all sleep in the family room. After putting it to a vote, we opted for the Family room. That might have been a mistake.

Shawna and Carla pulled out their wands and conjured sleeping bags and mattresses for themselves and laid them out on the floor, looking at us expectantly. "Hello? Are you going to get yourselves sleeping bags or not?"

I glanced at Hermione. Our extra magic privileges had run out as soon as we arrived in New York. "Well," Hermione began, "Are we even allowed?"

Carla seemed to understand. "There's no age restriction here. The magical government is virtually nonexistent. So basically, you could teach a two year old a spell and it would be okay. The only real think is that you can't get a wand until you're nine."

"Oh." Harry and I said in unison as we pulled out our own wands and conjured sleeping bags and mattresses for ourselves. Malfoy stood watching as Hermione also got herself a place to sleep before transfiguring the couch into a large, four-poster bed surrounded by black curtains.

Shawna looked through a cabinet, before pulling out a few small rectangular objects. "Master and Commander, Pet Cemetery, Urban Legend, or Pirates of the Caribbean first?"

Hermione practically squealed with delight. "Pirates of the Caribbean!" I gave her a quizzical look, why was Hermione so excites about pirates? Her reply- " Four words, Shawna, can you guess what they are?"

"Orlando Bloom, Johnny Deep."

"Hell yes!" Hermione said, giving her cousin a high-five.

A high five, I kid you not.

The "movie" as it turned out to be called was pretty good. And that girl in it was really hot. Another thing the muggles have done right is microwave popcorn. That stuff is good!

When the movie was over, Carla started looking through the cabinet for another. She was about to take one out when Shawna stopped her, smacking her in the arm, and shoving it into the back of the cabinet.

I wonder what they're hiding?

* * *

KG- All right- whoever can guess what she's hiding gets the random award of the day.! 


	8. Starbucks Rules!

**A/N:** _for all who reviewed with a guess_ your guesses have been used in this chapter, thanks for guessing. WHOEVER GUESSES CORRECTLY WHAT SHAWNA AND CARLA ARE HIDING GETS THE RANDOM AWARD OF THE DAY!

**disclaimer:** I don't own anything except for Shawna, Carla, and the plot. All Harry Potter stuff belongs to JKR, and Hot Topic and Starbucks belong to someone other than me.

* * *

Harry's POV: 

Ron mentioned something about Carla and Shawna hiding something. We can't figure out what it is so we're making a list:

Porn Tape  
Sex toys  
Chocolate?

Why we came up with chocolate, I have no idea, but we did. Maybe they're really possessive of their chocolate. Or maybe, they're hiding illegal potions ingredients. I wonder...

xxxxxxx

Ginny's POV:

Harry mentioned something about Carla and Shawna hiding something. I have no idea what though. I don't see a reason for them to be hiding anything, but then again, everyone has there own little things about themselves.

My guess- Paris Hilton sex tape? I have no idea who she is, but I heard Hermione and Shawna talking about her and how much of a whore she is, so maybe...

But anyhoo... We're going to the mall! Yay! I love to shop! Shopping is fun! Yay! All the kids at Hogwarts are going to be so shocked when they see our tape, America ROCKS!

Xxxxxxxx

Draco's POV:

Shiny things are fun.

Xxxxxxxx

Hermione's POV:

I am going to KILL Shawna and Carla. Last night when we were watching movies they came so close... If Harry finds out, he's going to flip. And I don't think he would be able to take some of the things that would happen if people found out there really is a Harry Potter, Boy-Who-Lived.

Harry CAN'T get his hands on them. Oh my god! He'd... Sirius, if he found out about what 'happened' to Sirius, he'd die. He really would. Sirius means the world to him. If he thought Sirius is dead... Not good.

But on a lighter note... We're going to the mall! This is going to be so much fun!

Xxxxxxxx

Ron's POV:

The girls decided we needed to go shopping today. That was an interesting experience.

We got to the mall around 10:30 AM, and immediately Carla and Shawna took us into Hot Topic. That place is friggin scary, but really cool at the same time.

Hermione went ballistic- she bought so much stuff there... I never saw her as someone to shop there. Then again, I never knew that Hot Topic existed until today, so there you go.

Then we Hermione and Ginny went off with Shawna and Carla to buy bathing suits, so Harry, Malfoy, and I were left to wander around by ourselves.

We went into a place called Barnes and Noble. It was really big. There were a lot of books, and Starbucks coffee is really good. End of Story. Well, not really. There were all these signs about some lady named JK Rowling coming for a book signing in a few days. And all these people were getting overly excited about it. Then these girls came up to us and asked us who we thought we were. When we answered with "Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, and Ron Weasley" they said it was a little early for Halloween and called us freaks. They said something about being like some guy named Michael Jackson who thinks that he's Peter Pan. I am NOT a child rapist!

Who's Peter Pan?

Xxxxxxx

Carla's POV:

As we came out of BEACH WEAR USA which if you ask me is a kind of stupid store to have in Northern New York, but whatever, I asked Shawna. "Do you know where the guys were going?"

"No. I have no idea."

"Hello." We turned around to see them standing behind us.

"Hi guys. What'd you find?"

"I love Starbucks!" Ron said enthusiastically. Draco was playing with one of those Rubix cube pens, and seemed to be having a great deal of difficulty.

As we walked out to the car, Harry caught up to me. "Hey Carla, do you know who JK Rowling is?"

Oh shit.

* * *

PLEASE REVIEW or i will send the evil army of the evil sporks of doom after you 


	9. First name basis

Shawna's POV:

Carla came up to me as we were getting into the car. "Shawna, we have a serious problem."

"What? Did Devon break up with you?"

"NO! Harry Ron and Draco went into Barnes and Noble, and you saw the other day, all of those signs?"

"Signs for what?'

"The JK Rowling book signing. Hello? Remember? You were like freaking out about it?"

"Oh my god they saw the signs? Do they know who she is?"

"No. But Harry did ask me who she was."

Oh crap, this is not good.

xxxxxx

Harry's POV:

I wonder who that JK Rowling person is. I want to find out. Maybe We can go back to the mall that day. For some reason, Shawna and Carla don't want to tell me who she is. I wonder why.

xxxxx

Draco's POV:

What is a pool party? What ever it is, we're going to one. Although the attire is a little kind of, not there( I mean, swimming trunks to a party? These muggles are insane. The girls are making an extremely big deal about it though, especially after they found out a certain guy named Cameron was going to be there. (Well, actually, that was just Shawna) I am very intrigued to find out what this pool party involves, though. I'm just glad it isn't long until we go.

xxxxx

Ginny's POV:

I can't wait until the pool party. Hermione and I picked out the cutest swim suits. Although I think Ron might die of shock when he sees mine, it's a little on the small side. But so is Hermione's. I'm just hoping that a certain, green-eyed, black-haired, teenage wizard who has defeated You-Know-Who repeatedly will notice as well.

xxxxx

Hermione's POV:

It is so obvious Ginny has a major crush on Harry. I just had to let her get that bikini. Yeah I know Ron's not going to be happy about it, but I really don't care. Screw Ron.

Actually, on second thought, that does sound like fun.

xxxxx

Draco's POV:

So Today, I found out what a pool party was. A party in a giant whole filled with water that stings your eyes. Actually it was quite fun. And there were many girls in small bathing suits who seemed quite fond of me. Then we ate some extremely good food called pizza. personally I am quite fond of the kind they call pepperoni. Delicious.

**Draco, buddy pal...**

_What do you want?_

**Do me a favor will ya?**

_Will you go away if I do?_

**At the moment, yes. **

_Okay. What do you want?_

**Go over to Harry and mention something about talking to himself, or being gay. **

_DID YOU JUST SAY HARRY WAS GAY?_

**Of course you don't like him.**

xxxxx

Ron's POV:

Somebody get Malfoy away from the Pizza!

There were quite a few interesting people at this pool party. Heather, the girl who's party it was, is of medium height, had curly brown hair, and gray eyes. She's extremely... I guess the word would be innocent. She was shocked when I said "Bloody Hell" after Harry and Ginny Dumped a bucket of ice water on my head. Then there was Jamie. He and Heather insist that they're just friends, but I don't believe it. We met Carla's boyfriend Devon, who was introduced by Carla with "Oh yeah. This is Devon, He's my bitch." Shawna calling him an "Abercrombie man whore!" getting her thrown into the pool. There were the Frey triplets, Kelley, Laural and Nathan. They were pretty cool, although Kelley and Laural were a little hostile. Then there was Victoria, a good friend of Shawna's. She was coincidentally wearing a blue version of Ginny's bathing suit.

Speaking of Ginny's bathing suit. I'm going to go kill Hermione.

xxxxx

Harry's POV:

I was sitting in the pool, minding my own business, when all of the sudden Draco leaped off the diving board and made a huge splash, which of course, hit me in the face. Victoria should never have taught him how to do a cannon ball. Shawna gracefully dove in after him, barely making a splash, and came up at the other end of the pool.

Draco surfaced, shaking his blonde hair out of his eyes.

_Isn't he cute when he's wet?_

**Don't you ever go away?**

_Of course not, where'd you get that idea?_

**I'M NOT GAY!**

_That was rather loud. _

**Shut up, I'm not falling for that **

"Potter? Why are you talking to yourself? And what's all this nonsense about you not being gay?" I turned around to see Draco floating behind me.

"I'm straight Draco." I said rather annoyed **Damnit!**

_Ha ha. _

_"_As a rainbow, Harry." He said, turning and swimming away

**Did he just call me Harry?** I sighed and slid under the water.

xxxxx

Hermione's POV:

Carla and Devon came over to me. " Do you guys want to join the band at school?" She asked, taking a handful of cheese doodles.

"I don't play an instrument. And I don't think anyone else does either."

"Oh no, it's cool. They assign you an instrument, and you give them like twenty bucks, and they'll like put some spell on it that actually teaches you like the basics of how to play it."

'Really? That's cool. I'll go ask." I walked around finding everyone, and asking their opinions. It was unanimous. We were joining the band.

Xxxxxxx

* * *

**A/N: **Oh my gosh i can' believe i've been this lazy! Grrr! i'm sorry bout how long it's taken me to updatem, and the shortness of this chapter, but hopefully when school's out and finals are cone and everything, i'll be able to update faster. PLEASE REVIEW! 


	10. Instrumentation at MANY

A/N: hiya people! I know it's a little short, but it wouldn't fit in with what I want to do next, and i didn't have a lot of time to write/post this, so inorder to get a chapter up sooner than i did last time, I had to cut it short. Sorry.

to KittyKat119; See, your name's in here. HAHA! I was going to mention you. calm yourself child.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own it! Leave me alone!

* * *

Harry's POV:

Today we joined the band, at the Magical Academy of New York or MANY, as it is affectionately called. The teacher, Mr. T (I don't know his real name, just that he's called Mr. T) seems really nice. I was assigned the oboe. It's actually quite interesting looking, but it sounds like a dying duck. At least I didn't get a totally girlie instrument, like Draco did.  
Some girl named Caitlin was there too. She plays the saxophone, and had to get hers fixed. She seems nice enough. Apparently she knows Shawna and Victoria, cause she was talking to Shawna for like forever.I never undersooodhow girls could talk for that long. My mouth would get tired.

XXXXX

Hermione's POV:

Band is so going to rock. I'm a drummer! How awesome is that? Oh yeah! Also, I stand in the back of the room, So if there are any hot boys in the class, I can stare at them. If not... I'll just stare at Ron.

XXXXX

Ron's POV:

I play the trumpet. It's loud and it annoys Hermione.

Life is GOOD- I have a guy instrument, and I can annoy Hermione with it! I almost feel bad for Malfoy though. Never mind, I'm over it now!

XXXXX

Shawna's POV:

Draco and I play the same instrument! This is going to be soooo cool! And from what I've heard, he's better than I am. I wonder how that happened. I've been playing for two years, he started today.

XXXXX

Draco's POV:

This is not good.

I thought I'd get a different instrument this time. I didn't think they'd assign it to me again. I can't even tell them that I've been playing for like 5 years, or they'll laugh at me. And the instrument they gave me is so much worse than the one I have.

God I miss my piccolo. It's shinier than the one they gave me.

XXXXX

Ginny's POV:

I play the clarinet. It's cool. Shawna says that her friends Victoria and Carla play it too, so I'll have somebody to sit with. Awesome!

I can't believe that Draco got the flute/piccolo. That's so funny. They're such girlie instruments. Although Shawna says that there's another Guy flute player in the band. He's like 2nd chair or something. She plays piccolo only though, so eventually Draco'll be playing with her. I almost feel bad for the guy...

Never mind.


	11. Look like you

Draco's POV:

When we got home, everybody wanted to practice their new instruments. I already play mine. So I had to pretend to be horrible when actually, I was better then all of them. My actual piccolo was sitting, shrunken down, in the bottom of my suitcase. It was driving me crazy.

"Crap this vibrato stuff is hard!" Shawna exclaimed, lowering her piccolo from her lips. I wanted to kill her. Its all in your breath, it really is.

"It's not that hard." I said, although at the time, I didn't know what exactly I was saying.

"What do you mean? It _is_ hard. And How do you know anyway? You've been playing for a grand total of about two hours!" She snapped.

That was the last straw. "For your information, I started playing the flute when I was five years old, I switched to the Piccolo at eight."

"There's no way. I heard you play before. You're horrible."

"Its the retarded teaching charms, they make you play worse. And I was trying to play badly in the first place."

"Prove it." She challenged.

I walked out of the room, and went to go find my suitcase. I dug around in the bottom, until my fingers brushed the tiny case. I grabbed it, stuffed it in my pocket, and went back to the others. Pulling out my wand, and the case, I tapped the case with my wand, returning it to its full size. I unlatched the outer pocket, and took put together my piccolo. "It's made of pure silver." I said to Shawna casually. "Helps the tone quality." Putting it to my lips, I played a few scales, all in vibrato, then launched into one of the pieces I had memorized. It wasn't all that hard, I had learned it about three years ago, but it still sounded good. When I finished, the others were silent until Shawna spoke. "I think I believe you now."

Xxxxx

Shawna's POV:

Wow, Draco's good. I wish I could play like that.

Xxxxx

Harry's POV:

Flute players are sexy. Especially Draco, cause when he play's, this look comes over his face. Its a combination between total relaxation, and intense concentration. And his hair falls in his eyes, and... Oh god he's just beautiful. That's the only way to describe it. Beautiful.

I wish there was some way I could show off to him, but the only real talent I have is Quidditch, and he's good at that too.

Life is so unfair

Xxxxxx

Ginny's POV:

OK, I don't feel sorry for Draco's girlie instrument anymore. That thing is awesome. It's so small, but it's really loud. And he's pretty cute when he's playing it too, his hair falls in his eyes, and he's just... Hot. But not as hot as Harry, mind you. Harry's in a league of his own. Imagine if he had brothers. This earth would be a much better place.

Xxxxxx

Carla's POV:

We move in at school tomorrow. I can't wait, I'm kind of tired of having to be at Shawna's house all the time, especially with her parents giving us the evil eye every second of the day. They are so creepy! I think they hate everything that is magical, but they're too afraid of it to do anything.

So we were bored, with nothing to do, so we decided to go walk around in the mall. Ron pulled us into Barnes and Noble, apparently he was going through Starbucks withdrawal. But there was no way we were getting into the Starbucks.

The place was swarming with people in black robes, and fake glasses with tape with lightning bolts drawn on their foreheads in eyeliner. Then there were the red heads with fake rats, or beat up old diaries, or the girls with their hair all frizzy, with stacks of books in their hands. Then we saw the table, where a red-haired woman sat, people coming up to her, and handing her a book. She'd take out a pen, and quickly scribble something inside the cover, and then the next person would come, and it would happen again.

Shawna came up to me. "We're in deep shit."

"Yeah."

Over to the side of the table was a sign. "Harry Potter Character look-alike contest. Register now. Prize- trip for winners and 2 friends each to England to meet the cast of Harry Potter."

"Guys..." Harry came up to us. "What's going on?"

"We'll explain later. Did you guys bring your Hogwarts robes with you?"

"Yeah..." He looked confused. " They're at the house. Why?"

"Here," Shawna handed him her bracelet. "Go get Hermione, Ron, Ginny, and Draco, use this to go back to the house, change, and then come back. I want you guys to enter into the contest."

"What contest.?"

"The Harry Potter character look-alike contest. Trust me, ok?"

"Okay." He walked over to the group, and they disappeared. About ten minutes later, they walked back in through the front door of the store, dressed in their Hogwarts robes, wands in hand. Draco, Harry, Ron and Ginny carried brooms under their arms as well. Hermione carried a stack of books, on top of the pile was the infamous _Hogwarts, A History_. They walked over towards us.

"What do you think?" Harry asked me.

"I think that you look like... Well, you." I said truthfully. "I signed you up, just go up when they call your names."

He had opened his mouth to speak when there was the sound of feedback, and a mans voice said, "If I can' have everybody's attention please?" He paused for a moment as everybody turned to face him where he stood on a platform behind the sign up table. "We're about to start the contest now. If the contestants will come towards the stage. We'll call you up in groups of five. Starting with..." He read off five names and five boys, air dyed black, and spiked up all over the place, with wire twisted into the crude shape of a pair of glasses with tape on the bridge walked up to the platform. Notes were made by the judges. The process was repeated a few times with varying groups until... "Now here's a dedicated bunch. May I see Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Ginny Weasley, and, here's a first, Draco Malfoy up here please?"

The group walked forwards, and the crowd gasped. It really was quite shocking really, compared to the others. Suddenly Ginny and Draco Tripped, ending with Ginny face down on the floor. Draco managed to stay standing. Hermione rushed to Help Ginny up. "Why'd you do that Malfoy?"

"Me? I didn't do anything to the littlest Weasel. She tripped me! She'd just to stupid to manage to stand up. Stay out of this you filthy mudblood." Draco said, a note of disgust in his voice.

"Don't you dare call her a mudblood!" Ron said, at the exact same time Harry said "Even as a muggle born she's a better person than you are!"

"Really? I doubt it. But if you think so, Prove it."

I saw Hermione reach for her wand, which had been stuck into her pocket, but then, she seemed to realize what a disaster that would have been, and instead took to doing things the old-fashioned way. She pulled back her fist and punched Draco hard in the jaw.

"There's your proof, Malfoy." She said, as he held his jaw on the ground.

"We really are a bad influence on her." Ron said to Harry, "How many times has she done that before?"

Before he could answer, the crowd of people applauded. They looked around, startled, as the announcer came back on the stage. "Well that was the first time we've had anyone at for us. Wonderful. Thank you. It's just a moment while the judges tally the scores, and then we'll announce the winner!" He stepped down, and Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Draco walked back over to us.

"Well _that_ went well." Ginny said sarcastically.

"Are you kidding? That was great!" I said. "You guys were so in character it was like you actually _were _them!"

"They are the characters. Remember?" Shawna said.

"Oh yeah!"

Xxxxx

Hermione's POV:

"Oh yeah!" Carla said, smacking herself on the fore head.

" Well, I can't say it went all that well." Hermione said, annoyed. "I couldn't have picked a worse way for you to find out about all this. "

"Well, we did." Ron said. "But really it's not all that bad. I mean look!" He pointed to a group of girls who were staring at them from across the room. "They think I'm gorgeous!"

"I'm sure it's you." Draco said sarcastically.

"What's that supposed to mean? You think they'd be looking at _you? _That's funny! Never knew you had a sense of humor Malfoy."

Draco sent Ron a venomous glare, and was about to retort when the man stood at the platform again.

"It seems the judges have reached a decision..."


	12. a confession my revenge

A/N: OK, so I got HBP, and I finished it that night, (I went to that late night thing and then stayed up till three AM reading) AS an understatement... I was PISSED. How could she do that? Well anyhoo, The events of this story are my revenge. Take That!

Disclaimer: The characters of this story are on the large part, not mine. They belong to JK Rowling. I also have no with for violence towards JKR, just so u know.

* * *

Ginny's POV: 

They guy came up on the platform. "The judges have made their decision." He paused dramatically, then read off the third and second place groups. "Now.. For first place.. With the trip to England to meet the cast of the Harry Potter movies... Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Ginny Weasley, and Draco Malfoy!"

We walked up to the platform, where we shook hands with the red-haired woman who thanked us for "being so enthusiastic about her work" "Now." She said "May I ask, What are your real names?"

"We told you." Said Harry. "I'm Harry Potter, and this is Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco."

I could hear Ron whispered to Hermione "Since when does Harry call him Draco?" I was thinking the same thing, actually, but, whatever.

"That's impossible. There's no way you all would actually be named... And look like... You're all just a bunch of people with a sick obsession!"

"Want me to prove that we're telling the truth?" Hermione challenged.

"Oh please do." The red haired woman said sarcastically.

Hermione smiled slyly, and I laughed to herself. This was the evil Hermione look that she wore when contemplating doing something really nasty. Usually, she never actually did it, but this time, I knew she would. She took her wand out of her pocket, and muttered an incantation. The red haired woman jumped up on a table, and started flapping her arms and acting like a chicken.

The crowd roared with laughter, and Hermione cut off the spell with a quick cheering charm, causing the woman to roll on the ground with laughter. Then, out of nowhere, she put her into a full body bind.

"You stupid bitch." Hermione muttered, so that with the chatter from the crowd, the only people who could hear were our group and of course the red haired woman.

Xxxx

Hermione's POV:

May I Point out that the "red haired woman" that Ginny keeps referring to is J.K. Rownling?

Xxxxx

Ginny's POV:

Oh really? Who the hell is that?

Xxxx

Hermione's POV:

The woman who "created" the Harry Potter series.

Xxxxx

Ginny's POV:

Oh! So that's why they were all upset when Harry...

Ok, let me get back to my story.

"You stupid bitch." Hermione muttered, so that with the chatter from the crowd, the only people who could hear were our group and of course the red haired woman. "You stupid fucking bitch. You've been using us all along. Haven't you? Someone's been feeding you stories, and you've been selling them. Who was it? Cause whoever they were, they did a crappy job with recounting our fifth year. Nothing like that ever happened. And, most importantly, Sirius is still alive.

"What did you just say?" Asked Harry, a dangerous look on his face. I've never seen him look like that before. Ever. "What about Sirius?"

Apparently JK Rowling (aka, the red haired woman, as Hermione so wonderfully pointed out) had been released from the body bind cause she spoke. "Yeah, that's right. Your precious godfather is dead. You killed him! Sirius Black is dead!"

"NO! No! It's not true. We saw him right before..."

"Believe it golden boy. The Marauders are dwindling, aren't they? Two dead, one turned traitor. Looks like Lupin's the only one left, really. But with the fighting with Voldemort, it's only a matter of time, really."

Harry raised his wand, slowly, and half the time it looked like he was about to put it back down, but JK Rowling spoke again. "Maybe you'll even be responsible for his death to! I mean, you caused the fall of the Marauders, really. _You _ caused Peter Pettigrew to first turn traitor, and then have to go into hiding. _ You _caused your parents deaths. _ You _ caused Sirius to be imprisoned in Azkaban, and then, two years after he was freed, _ you _are responsible for his death! Really I wonder how Remus can look on you with any care at all, when you've been responsible for the down fall of his only friends."

"AVADA KEDAVRA!" A jet of emerald green light shot from Harry's wand and into the annoying author (who I'm pretty sure wasn't all that right in the head). She fell down, dead.

There was a moment of silence, shock I guess, then an uproar. The crowd surged forward, towards us. We ran to the judges table, picked up our prizes and ran, Shawna and Carla close behind.

Once we were out in the parking lot, we slowed down a little bit to catch our breath. Hearing voices, I looked back to see Harry and Draco talking to two random girls, and pulled them away, so we could get out of there.

Somehow, I don't think this is all going to go away any time soon.

Xxxx

Harry's POV:

OK, so as we were running away from the crazed mob, somehow, Draco and I ended up running next to each other. Then, when we were walking out in the parking lot, these two girls came up to us.

One, the taller of the two, with straight brown hair, came up next to me. "Hey sexy."

The shorter girl with curly blonde hair was next to Draco. The made this little cat hand motion and growled at us. Thank god Ginny pulled us away when she did. I had committed murder, the last thing I needed that night was to be gang raped in the mall parking lot.

Xxxxx

Draco's POV:

OK, so a week after the whole bookstore incident, we had been back at school for a few days, and our first weekend was coming up. The idea for entertainment that was selected was Carla's- "Why don't we all just stay in our rooms and sleep?"

Personally I would normally liked this idea. I mean, I like sleep almost as much as I like shiny objects. There's one catch though- we don't each have our own bedrooms. The assignments are- Shawna and Carla, Hermione and Ginny, and then Weasley, Harry and I in the largest room (since there's three of us). Meaning I'm sharing a room with two Gryffindors, and two people who happen to hate me. Not to mention that I hate them too.

**Well, only one of them. **

_What?_

**You don't hate both of them. Only Weasley. **

_I don't like Harry. _

**Exactly. You Looooooove him. **

_ No I don't. _

**Yes you do. **

_No I don't. _

**Yes you do.**

_This is pointless. I'm not talking to you anymore. _

But as much as I hated to admit it, the little voice thing was right. It was only Weasley that I hated, and I hated him all the more for having to share the room with us. Taking away all chance of time alone with Harry. Although I doubt harry wants alone time, but it was the principal of the matter.

Xxxxx

Harry's POV:

For once in my school life I don't have to share a room with four other guys, and I get stuck in the only room with three people. Although if I had to choose who I wanted out, I really don't know who I would say, so maybe it's better this way.

Yes, for once and for all, in this little journal thingey, I'm admitting it. Harry James Potter; Boy-Who-Lived-To-Piss-off-Voldemort, am Gay. And I've fallen for Draco Malfoy.

You know what. Life just seriously sucks sometimes.

* * *

KG: ok, i feel better now.

CW: YOu do realize that if that had actually happened, you would never get to read Book 7

KG: I'd survive. That's what Fan fics are for!

CW: Whatever. PLEASE REVIEW!


	13. Dreams suicide and friendship

_Hello! I cannot believe how long its taken me to update... wow. I've been so bad about my fanfics... but if any of you have found me on Fiction Press, you know that I'm even worse at those... oops. _

_Well... at long last here it is- Chapter 13 of Culture Shock. I'm going to appologize now for it being so long between updates... and appologize in advance because i dont really know how long its going to be untill the next one. Sorry. _

_ This Chapters a litle angsty compared to the others, and there's very little humor. I appologixe to all of my readers who were looking forward to a funny new chapter. If you're one of those people, I'm sorry, but this isn't it. I am however very proud of the way i wrote this section. Finally Harry and Draco are starting to admit their feelings for eachother... and the angst and all that is necessary for what I think is going to happen in the next few chapters. Pther than that, I'm not really sure whats going on. _

_Thank you all very much for your suppost, and I'd appreciate if you'd review and tell me what you think. Thank you. _

**DISCLAIMER:****Harry Potter and all related material is the property of JK Rowling. I claim ownership of nothing. **

* * *

Harry's POV:

I cant take this anymore... These Americans are starting to get to me.

Don't get me wrong, I mean, The School itself is beautiful. In the fall there were beautifully colored leaves everywhere, and now, as winter settles in further, the days are crisp and cold. The whole band thing, with learning the instruments is good... My oboe is going well, and Draco's switched fully to the Piccolo.

Did I ever say how amazing he is? And how beautiful he looks when he played that tiny instrument?

It's not the school, it's the people. To them, Harry Potter is made up, so when they see me in the hallway, It's a double take, then the eye-flick, all of which I'm used to.

It's the laughter I can't stand.

All the people, they just look, find the scar, and laugh. laugh like I'm some kind of freak. A fan of a book that got a little too carried away with a razor blade one day and gave himself a lightning-bolt scar.

But let me tell you... the scars I give myself wont be in the shape of lightning bolts.

I dream about it at night, and it scares me every morning- the subtle numbing pain that makes everything fade away. The clean cuts, and the deep red liquid that drips from them, as I cut deeper and deeper. Blood... my blood. And sometimes, I go so deep , that everything goes away, and in my dream my world gets fuzzy, and then, just when I'm about to black out for the last time- I wake up.

They say it's impossible to die in your dreams, but sometimes, I just wish they'd let me.

xxxxx

Draco's POV:

_And I've fallen for Draco Malfoy. You know what? Life just seriously sucks sometimes_...

_The scars I give myself wont be in the shape of lightning bolts..._

_They say it's impossible to die in your dreams, but sometimes, I just wish they'd let me._

I know I shouldn't have done it, but it was just sitting there on his bed. Harry's trip journal.

And once I started reading, I couldn't stop. To see this whole trip so far through his eyes... it was kind of strange. I was always told that Harry Potter was a spoiled brat, held in the highest regard, living in a mansion ten times larger and grander than my own.

But then I met him. In that shop on Diagon Alley, I believe it was while I was being measured for new robes. In walks this skinny, timid little boy, with black hair- and at first I thought he might be someone to torment, if indeed he was going to be a first year. But Then he looked up, and I saw those amazingly green eyes of his, and instantly knew that I had to make him my friend. Apparently, he was less than impressed with my efforts at forming a friendship.

I thought that I would never see that green-eyed boy again. And on the train ride to Hogwarts, the rumors of Harry Potter's entrance into the school spread like wildfire. I wasn't sure what to do. I mean on one hand, He had brought down the Dark Lord. On the other, He was powerful enough to do so. And father had always said to make powerful friends.

I decided to introduce myself, and when he turned around I saw those clear, deep green eyes, and knew that my attempts at friendship were going to be useless. I'd most likely already made an enemy of the boy, and he didn't look like he had a problem with that.

He rejected me, plain and simple. So I decided to forget him- better yet, try my hardest to make his life a living hell. I know it wasn't right, after all he's been through, to make it worse for him, but its not like he didn't have his revenge. There were moments.

And now. All those feelings of needing him are coming back to me. I can't stand it. It's driving me crazy. Right now, I'm sitting on my bed as I'm writing this, with Harry already asleep, and Weasley nowhere to be found.

He looks so peaceful when he's asleep. His face is soft and relaxed, and I wonder what this amazing boy is dreaming about. What do you dream about? Is it all the shit that's happened to you in your life- replaying over and over in your head, and filling in the blanks where you can't remember everything, where you blocked it all out, and the images you create for yourself are just as bad as the ones you actually saw. Or are you inventing yourself the perfect family- the one you never had? The normal life with loving parents, and friends, and without all the people who stare and whisper as you pass.

I love you. Do you know that?

Damn You Harry Potter, You made me fall in love with you, when I'm supposed to hate you. I'm supposed to hate everything about you, but everything I'm supposed to hate, I end up loving. Damn you Father, for bringing me up in this world the way you did. Raising me to hate people who have done nothing to deserve it. Girls who were born magical in the muggle world, who have studied hard to prove themselves; Guys who's families believe in justice, and keep believing even thought they're avoided by other purebloods; and a famous boy who did nothing to deserve it, was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Who was given fame and the responsibility of saving the wizarding world in exchange for a loving family. Damn you Lord Voldemort. I'm not afraid to write your name, even thought I still avoid speaking it. damn you for taking away my Father, bringing him into your world of hatred and violence, killing and lies. Brainwashing him into believing that everyone is beneath him, and that I should be raised into the same morals that you brought him into. You took away my Father, who frightened my mother into silence, and forced me to become a cold hard shell in order to impress him and in turn, you.

Damn you world- for keeping me from the life I deserve. The life that I need. The life that _I _dream about.

Hermione's POV:

Harry's been acting very strange lately. He's quieter than usual, and I've caught him clutching at his wrists. holding them to his chest. like he was protecting them from something.

I'm worried about him. I don't know if he can take much more than he's already been through. He was given so much responsibility at such a young age, and now he's guilty of murder- not that anyone will accuse him of it. I've heard that all the muggles' memories have been modified to believe that J.K. Rowling died of a heart attack... and the wizards who know will never accuse him- he's Harry Potter after all.

But he's not just Harry Potter. He's a boy who needs someone to love him, a boy who desperately wants a real family, and a boy who only wants to be normal.

Above that, he's Harry Potter, one of the best friends anyone could ask for.


End file.
